Go without, until the need seeps in

I have this spectacular bruise on my leg from where this metal bin kalumped into me. Now maybe it was because I was swinging it around and maybe it was because I was dancing a little bit because I was bored of carting it up and down the stairs to get the recycling from the recycling bin to the big ole plastic bag and I was trying to get my mind off whatever that weird yellow crusty food thing was on the side of one the containers but hey, not my fault. It doesn't hurt mind. It's just turning funny colours. I've got a thing about bruises, not a sexual thing just a fascination. Probably because I'm always covered in them. I walk into a lot of doors. It's the colour changing aspect. Ooh let's be poetic and say it's like autumnal leaves or a tacky mood ring. Helen had this fantastic one on her hip. It was nasty looking, all purple and red. My dad (apparently) had a great one where the doctor had leant on him during surgery but he didn't want to show me and I didn't pester him. Mostly due to placement.

Ok so less weird I checked out the website of the new lingerie shop that opened on Ingram Street. Just to see if it truly is as expensive as I thought it might be. The website had a sale. So now instead of paying £80 for a bra (a bra and nothing else mind, if you want the matching thong, knickers, shorts, suspender belt, cami or basque well you're screwed my friend and not in the way you might be if you could purchase these things) you can pay £50! You know what £50 is to me? Two weeks wages and two weeks further away from my goal. But I thought, well it's ok. I don't have a boyfriend anyway and most of this stuff is impractical for reasons other than boyfriend so just click away and look at shops you can afford. Like Oxfam. But you see the hosiery button taunted me. Girls all have their weaknesses. Handbags, shoes, underwear, jewellery. Mine is nylon. I can't actually shut my drawer where I keep my tights and socks. I only wear my knee high socks around the house when it's cold (so always), I don't wear the fishnets anymore and the neon pink ones are stuffed in the back. I tore a hole in my favourite ones and forgot to buy another pair, I may do that next week actually if I can find them again. I tore another hole in my overly pretty ones but I stitched it back up so we're fine. I'm truly awful with hold ups though. It's pretty safe to say if I wear 'em they'll get trashed. I mean the last pair I wrecked by putting them in my pocket. With my keys. Not so smart.

Point is I clicked and browsed and thought oh hey these are quite nice but pricey, ah well.

And then I saw the most utterly impractical and gorgeous ones. They lace up the back of your legs with ribbon like a corset and just looking at them does funny things to the pit of my stomach. £46 for 1 pair that I could not wear in public and would most definitely ruin instantly. I need me a rich man.