What have we learned?

It's been a month of my second first year at Glasgow University. To celebrate and to prove that I'm getting something out of this I've decided to share with you some of the more interesting things I've learnt so far.

1. You can always improve a lecture by using the Nazis as an example.
2. Archaeology can be "the most fun you can have with your pants on."
3. The begetting section of the Bible actually has a use other than filler.
4. King John, upon seeing Hadrian's Wall, declared it was built by a race of Giants who had died out in a series of earthquakes.
5. Pippin after seeing the success of Gondor went on to usurp the throne of what would become modern day France.
6. Dublin is a Viking city. Thus Vikings with Irish accents exist. Just for you Emma!
7. It's alright to cheat on your wife as long as you cry about it a lot.
8. Homer may have been a Homera.
9. The more technology one has, the more civilised one is.
10. When the Greeks passed through Egypt they left graffiti on important monuments.
11. Never ask for help to defend your empire when nobody really trusts you in the first place. You get the crusades instead.
12. Nazis really did go around looking for archaeological evidence that they rocked during the thirties.
13. Never trust a god. They'll help you through all the things you probably didn't need much help with but when you take on 108 men by yourself they turn into a bird and fly off to laugh at you from a safe distance.
14. SUBTERFUDGE
15. The biggest threat to Odysseus in all the twenty years he spent away from home is impotence.
16. The best Pope name so far is Pope Innocent the third.
17. Being a solitary hermit is hard to do. Everyone wants to follow you thus ruining the whole point of being a hermit in the first place.
18. If you fight hard enough for a cause the Church doesn't agree with at all they just might give in. Just before you die. And it will only apply to you.
19. Never brag that your wife is the hottest ever and then force your right hand man to sneak in and see her naked.
20. The Greeks had a guide on when and where to pee.
21. Humans have the same number of hair follicles on their body as a monkey.
22. Aphrodite, the most beautiful and sexy thing to ever supposedly exist, was created from the genitials of another God.
23. Professor Robes still exist. And people wear them. And call an OHP a visualiser.
24. Glasgow Uni was originally built in the East End until the area became a bit dodgy. Subsequently it was moved to the West End because it was feared the students would fool around with the prostitutes.
25. Admitting that the pickled babies in the Hunterian Museum make you broody makes even biology students freak.
26. The QMU put 2 shots of espresso in their Mocha and that's why taking a huge gulp of it thinking it would be weak like everywhere else is not a good move. Especially when that cute guy was sitting right next to you and saw your 'woah what did I just drink?!' face.
27. This goes double when you drink the really thick bitter chocolate syrup at the bottom of the cup that you forgot to mix properly.
And finally
28. Otters are cute