You're lost little girl

Sputnik flew Laika over the sea as my heart pretended not to break with my nose to the window, steaming up mountains and valleys and cities and towns. It was much like pretending not to be in love which gets easier each time you try it. I found a book in my dad's room that teaches Russian and I took it up to my room having checked thoroughly for our little buzzing friends. The Cyrillic alphabet makes me dizzy. A couple of years ago I went to St Petersburg and it's Paris in its design and Paris in its feel but its dangerous. The older people give you looks for being short and brunette because it is a city of the frighteningly tall. You should have seen the women. Think drunken girls on a night out for the outfit, glittering and foolish, only put that on a girl at least a foot taller, in catastrophic heels and legs that tower and it'll be 2 in the afternoon instead of the morning and you've got it. It was European oldest of all with hints of the Soviet, more prevalent as you leave the city in a minibus full of strangers and AmericanEuro splashed on the very top. And there was a moment, I have to ignore the big moments for this since I was in a shit place before I got there and then there was omg Julie (before you hit me for mentioning russia without telling you how much I love you, omg you're so awesome and such, do you still have that teddy bear? You are not awake yet, tell me later) but anyway.

There was a moment in the taxi when we were leaving and my face was glued to the window, not wanting to go home because I never want to go home and there's no bigger sink then the plane touching down. Every sign and every word was a shape I couldn't understand. I'd picked up a couple of words if I stared at them long enough and I could hear a couple of words if I listened hard enough but I was stuck on Da and Niet and Sbaseeba with a smile and a shrug and a please don't look at me. And that's when I learnt the Cyrillic alphabet makes me dizzy and I was determined to either crack it (which seems impossible without a class) or write it.

Sputnik flew Laika over the sea while I pretended my heart wasn't breaking and a success can be found even without survival. I call it project number four. The more I do the more likely one of them is good right?